I think what I like the most about working is having a schedule once again.

I think what I hate the most about working is having a schedule once again.

Weird ainít it?

Thereís no spontaneity during work hours. No getting up to Hula Hoop or play Guitar Hero to take a break but Iíve been eating better and sleeping better than I have in a long time. Everyone else is working so itís not like Iím missing something that my friends are doing and Iím not. Plus tonight, although I havenít had a paycheck yet, was the first time Fred asked me,

ďDo you need any money?Ē

And I replied,

ďNope, I got it.Ē

Because this is the first time that I knew that the money I spent would be replenished. Itís nice to have a sense of independence again. I donít know if Fred ever would have got as close to me as he did if I hadnít become so vulnerable with the lay off and if it didnít turn out to be so nice to have someone take care of me. But itís also nice to know that I still want him after Iíve fixed that vulnerability. He still has my heart.

Weight wise wouldnít ya know that just as I started complaining that I havenít lost anything I woke up to a two pound loss. Thatís my goal, two pounds a week. Itís slow but I will burn fat and not scavenge muscle like last time. I was so weak after I attained my goal weight last time. Not this time .. Iím not on a diet but a healthy life style and Iím amazed at how much you can eat if you stick to fruits and veggies!

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Spontaneous Not!